my inner voice is kind of a jerk

I was really in the riding to work zone for a while there and then completely lost momentum. I think it must be about a month since I last rode in – which is kind of disappointing. I really suck at times.

I was intending to get back to it this morning, but slept pretty badly and then futzed about – leaving myself not quite enough time to comfortably get in and ready for an early meeting (which then never eventuated). I was also intending to take my lunch – which also never eventuated because I forgot to take fixings from the freezer the night before. Again with the disappointing, and again with the I really suck sometimes.

I brooded on this all the way in to work, which of course spiralled into a kind of carolbaby is just generally terrible at All The Things (let me enumerate the many, many ways) refrain. 

Honestly, my head is often a really tiring (and tiresome and hostile) place to be. 

Thankfully I did get lunch ingredients from the freezer tonight and I’ve set the alarm 15 min earlier, so hopefully I can do both making lunch and ride in. I’d also like to attempt having breakfast, but maybe baby steps – I don’t want to think up yet more reasons I’m failing at life!

I think I really need some vitamin D (careful, non-sunburny doses) and exercise! Gah, what is it with this resistance?

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