On Monday afternoon I paid a visit to the dentist to have a porcelain tooth fitted over my impant and the hideously expensive dental procedure was complete!

Or so I thought.

That evening, barely 6 hours after the procedure, while eating Shepherd’s Pie, there was a wee pop. Something felt peculiar, so I flossed and verily, a wee sliver of my brand new tooth fell out, leaving what felt like a chasm. A sharp, quite pointy chasm.

And then there was the freaking out.

Ironically, the chasm was precisely what happened to the original tooth (and tongue memory being quite amazing, the chasm in exactly the same place), which, through abject poverty, I failed to do anything about until it was Too Late to do anything but remove it – because of aforesaid poverty.

I’ve christened the new tooth Steve Austin (the $6,000 tooth)¹. I was hopeful that George, my lovely Dentist, had the technology and could rebuild him, better than he was before: better, stronger, faster.

I saw George the next morning and he was horrified. He had never seen this happen before and was super-apologetic. I showed him the sliver I’d saved and he realised what had happened – there was a tiny air-bubble near the surface of Steve and he had collapsed under the pressure of chewing. George patched me up and I was good to go and Steve feels a lot better! Although it is weird to have a tooth in place after so long without one

I’d post a photo but y’all really don’t need to see the inside of my mouth.

¹yes, it really did cost that much. And my %^&%# health fund refunded me a giant $750.

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