Egads, can it really be time to return to work tomorrow? The holidays have gone way too quickly for my liking. I had all good intentions of writing a report during the time off, but as you can imagine, did precisely nothing of the sort, so I’ll be slaving mightily this week.

Tomorrow we’ll have two shiny new starters in Department Cool-until-you-are-in-it. One is to replace Boudecia and one is a contractor. I will endeavour to keep the Professor away from the newbies, lest he horrify them with his un-pc ways.

Recent examples of the Professor’s work include:

Mrs Hardly: (referring to Boudecia) “I swear its the (red) hair – highly-strung, demanding and really, really fierce.”
Professor: “She, like all women, just needs to be tamed.”
Mrs Hardly: “Oh. My. God.”
Professor: “You really need to get over this provincial, anglo-saxon, uptight attitude.”

Professor: “There was a very high proportion of nymphettes performing in the Schools’ Spectacular.”
Mrs Hardly: “Oh. My. God.”
Professor: “You really need to get over this provincial, anglo-saxon, uptight attitude.”

Professor: (speaking to colleague who planned to dress as batman for son’s pre-school disco)”So. will you get any in-costume action when you get home?”
Mrs Hardly: “Dear diary, I have a colleague who makes the most horrifyingly inappropriate remarks in the workplace.”
Professor: “You really need to get over this provincial, anglo-saxon, uptight attitude.”