cotton wool

So I’ve been taking the running slowly and not doing anything too stupid and keeping it to a very conservative 3 runs a week.

This week it was a 3km morning run on Friday and a 5km run yesterday. All very slow, like 30-60 seconds per km slower than I was running before. Given that I was already pretty slow, this is barely one step up from walking.

I’d planned a nice and easy 4km this morning. When I got outside and pressed go on the magical device it started madly buzzing and wouldn’t stop (and wouldn’t start tracking me). So I hustled back indoors to consult the InformationSuperHighway. Thankfully I managed to turn it off, but then it was pretty much dead. No factory reset, no connecting to the PC. Gah!

Despite TheUniverse clearly trying to tell me something, I decided to head out anyway. All was good until about km 3 when I think I was trying to read the embedded street name on the kerb, tripped (up the ramp, no less) and stacked it in spectacular fashion.

example embedded street name – not the one I tripped over

Fortunately I only ended up with a small graze on my right palm and a little one on the side of my knee (and now a bit of a sore right foot). About 500m later I was trying to work out in my head quite how I had fallen, was distracted by the city view, tripped and almost fell up the kerb ramp again, but managed to right myself.

Clearly I need a little more focus!

The garmin still is not working, I have emailed support, based on this useful thread. It was not inexpensive, so let’s hope it can be sorted!

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impractical tyrant

possibly worth it for the personality quiz

Earlier this week I attended a conflict management seminar. This seminar was pitched at women – which kind of went against my feminist sensibilities, but hey, whatever. I do have some issues at SML in handling aggressive, bullying dickheads (and people who lie outrageously – don’t even get me started) and I tend to brood for days and days on those negative interactions and let it impact my non-SML life way, way too much – so I was hoping to get some tips from the cranky lady seminar on how to overcome this.

And wow! I’ve never been in a time-share presentation, but I imagine that it would be been very much like the cranky lady seminar. It was All Selling All The Time – so much emphasis on flogging the very many, very over-priced “learning materials” at every opportunity (a $500 value, but $299.95 for today only!, $650 value, but today only $399.95). Or a cult. Or Amway. Or Tony Robbins.

There were around 60 women attending. The presenter was a very bouncy late-40s American lady who had been flown out for this series. She sounded exactly like Katy Sagal. The day very much stuck to the seminar format, so there was little to no interaction with the other participants.

Some highlights:

  • the 15 minutes of instruction on how to fill in the 10 question evaluation form and big emphasis on rating her highly: “the [unnamed provider] average is 8.5, I usually rate higher! Tell me what you need for you give me a 10!”
  • the selling
  • the lengthy rant about legalising pot in washington state. “it’s a gateway drug”, “they are in for a whole lot of social problems” and “I once had medical marijuana practitioners in a class and told them you’re really drug dealers!”
  • the selling
  • “women are just wired differently from men, it’s a fact!” (WTAF?)
  • mentioning the “law of attraction” (it’s just science!) and The Secret
  • the selling
  • lengthily pimping her no 1 itunes business audiobook
  • name-checking Tony Robbins
  • the selling
  • the many people who actually spent hundreds of dollars on learning materials
  • dropping a 15 minute speed-reading software sales demo into the post-lunch session.
  • the selling

The day was utterly mind-boggling and the actual non-sales, non-bizarre content was nothing I hadn’t heard before. Though when NotKaty casually mentioned she’d contacted people in the past who had given unfavourable evaluations (for development purposes, of course), I naturally gave the high rating.

Definitely something to add to the list of life experiences, but not necessarily one I’d been keen to repeat.

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didn’t see that coming

Tomorrow I will see TEN YEARS of enslavement at SML. Holy!Goodness!

Four days in I was wondering what the hell I was doing there and not much has changed – I pretty much still ask myself that several times a day.

A couple of weeks ago when a group of long term employees were searching through hard-copy photos to use for a significant SML anniversary celebrations and I came across this photo of my very first Christmas Party (four days after I started).

I had not seen it before, but truly, it is the best photo ever:

I look so impossibly young! Did my hair really look this good?

Every other photo of me at this event has me looking completely cheerful, this is gloriously unguarded and speaks completely to my feelings and if I ever wonder where Joan gets her “Joan” expression of utter contempt and judgement, I need look no further than this.

But to be honest, despite quite often extreme dysfunction and insanity, SML has been pretty good to me, I’ve developed some m4d sk1llz, my talents have been recognised and efforts rewarded and I found a pretty gosh-darned excellent husband.

And in 11 hours, I’ll have EIGHT WEEKS long service leave at my disposal. Woo!

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“the common zeitgeist of humanity” **

As I noted in the comments on the last post, I’m rarely plugged into the zeitgeist.

But recently, the were two instances on the InformationSuperHighway where I found I’m ever so slightly in touch with … something.

First was this guardian article about a dude whose wife set him 50 mini-challenges for his 50th birthday, which are detailed in this excellent blog.

Similar, but much superior to my languishing 50 before 50 project!


Next was this conceptual kitty haus featured on hauspanther which was also rather similar, but superior, to my own failed attempts:

excellent kitty haus

previous carolbaby attempts at kitty furniture 1

previous carolbaby attempts at kitty furniture 2


And yesterday In Real Life at SML’s 70s themed Xmas Party – when I unfortunately turned up in exactly the same white jumpsuit as a quite new girl in the comms team. Clearly this is what happens when you buy clothes from the same cheap online fashion purveyor as everyone else – something I generally try to avoid.

Comms girl, let’s call her MarmaladePumpkin, is in her late-20s, bright orange skin1, litres of black liquid eye-liner, “I’m all that” attitude and has already been quite aggressively pursuing several male colleagues. According to the parade of people who felt compelled to tell me, she apparently spent the entire party giving me death stares. Given that she and I have had no interactions, we could only conclude that she (really rather irrationally) took issue with my outfit. How funny. Really, while I totes rocked that jumpsuit I’m absolutely no competition. But clearly I’m the superior one here because, while often marginally unhinged, I’m not so batshitcrazy as to spend four hours with arms folded, glowering at someone because she wore the same clothes.

** oh community radio, never change!
2not orangeist

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projects 2014: november

I failed to update for September and October, but let’s have a crack at updating before the last month of the year (ZOMG! last month of the year?!?):

  1. Project 2014: Running – get back to running 15km on a regular basis.
    FAIL!: Yet another injury prevented much of anything, but in the last few days of November I’ve made a very slow return to running. Yay! In November I also dumped both the gym and the FatController – which was a big relief.

  2. Project 2014: Frugality – buy nothing unnecessary in 2014
    FAIL!: Well, I suppose one could argue that the purchases were all necessary. There were quite a lot of unanticipated expenses in the last month – we definitely need to cut back in 2015.

  3. Project 2014: Foodz – try a new recipe twice per month AND document it
    PARTIALLY ACHIEVED!: We started the 5:2 diet in September, new things were tried, documentation was (again) lacking.

  4. Project 2014: Micro-travel – Go away for (at least) FOUR weekends
    ACHIEVED!: Three of the four were in Melbourne, but hey, holidays!

  5. Project 2014: Education – Diploma of Advanced Manageressing
    FAIL!: I have an extension until November 2015. From December I REALLY need to get started on this.

  6. Project 2014: Escape – make plans for getting the heck out of SML
    FAIL!: Well there was A Reckoning and A Promotion, so I’m staying put for the next little bit.

  7. Project 2014: Try New Things – one new thing per month
    FAIL!: I’m at a bit of a loss to think of anything new that is not totally gaming the system! I did meet an imaginary internet friend completely by chance for the first time, but it is not like I really had much agency over that!

  8. Project 2014: Romance – do one couple-y/date-y thing per fortnight
    FAIL!: No dates

  9. Project 2014: Watching – watch good film and television regularly
    FAIL!: We did start watching the US version of House of Cards (thanks Bessie!) at the end of November.

  10. Project 2014: Sobriety – don’t drink too much alcohol
    FAIL!: Hahahahahaha, no. But back on the total sobriety train (with some celebratory December exceptions!)

  11. Project 2014: Reading – for every trashy book I read for teh lulz, read something proper
    PARTIALLY ACHIEVED!: So I read some things. Some of them were even published this year!
    mark henshaw: the snow kimono (conflicted about this – liked in bits, indifferent in bits) | paul daley: challenge (enjoyed – very now) | sue grafton: w is for wasted (perhaps not totally proper) (loved) | stuart littlemore: the murder book + counsel of choice + rats and mice (loved loved loved) | gillian flynn: gone girl (loathed x 23,76545374).

December? Holy!Goodness! I really need to ramp this up (and give some thought to 2015!)

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new paradigms

unleash your hair’s potential

Yesterday afternoon I went out for a 5km run, the longest distance I’ve run outside since 5 April!

It was dreadfully slow, about 3 minutes longer than my normal 5km time, but I am pretty stoked that I ran all the way, concentrated on my form, and came out of it with absolutely no pain and relatively minimal exhaustion.

I’m still planning on a very slow comeback. I seriously doubt that there will be a half-marathon in my immediate future, but maybe I can get back to 10km in several months.


5:2 continues to be wildly successful. In addition to losing a couple of sizes, it has really changed our diets overall – even on non-fast days. It could be the season, but we’re craving less of the rich, complex, slow cooked foods and more of the salads and simpler, lighter meals.

Shocking stuff.

This has thrown our weekend routines of many years out the window because lighter often means much less prep and much less being tied to the kitchen for hours. So I’m finding myself with rather more time on my hands than I am used to.

Must revist that list of projects! And find a new cooking repertoire!

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While engaging in a little light decluttering a couple of weeks ago, Joe/Frank came across a pair of old sunnies where the wee bolt/screw holding the arm had fallen out.

Rather than tossing them, I trawled through the giant box of screws and bolts and bits – though I really didn’t hold out much hope of finding anything small enough. And I was right, while there were some very tiny bolts, there were none quite small enough.

Not one to give up, I turned to the InformationSuperHighway and I found the very thing on ebay: a spectacle repair set for the princely sum on AU$2.65 (with free shipping). I’m not sure how comfortable I am with paying so little for something, but ethical issues aside …

The set arrived yesterday, I busted it out this afternoon and less than 5 minutes later:

Really very satisfying!

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